Hold Me Closer Tiny Banschee...

Another attempt to do away with the hiatus.

This one's for you, Caldwell!

This morning, I was en route to a regional meeting in Jean Short Nation {aka Gainesville, FL}. While in the car with 2 co-workers, the conversation somehow came about to us discussing the motherly task of breast feeding. Considering the fact that only one of three has actually had a child {who refers to her precious child as the tiny banschee}, it was a little strange. But we're all like family, so pretty much no topic is off limits. Anyway, as we discussed the extremely expensive breast pump models that all my friends are forking over HUNDREDS of dollars for, I got a G Chat from my friend Sara.

AHHHH FINALLY someone who doesn't know what it means to be engorged {I sure didn't}!!!

Now let me back it on up and tell you that Sara is not pregnant. In fact they just had their first baby. His name is Strongbow...

photo courtesy of Tyler Caldwell

He's precious and perfect and totally doesn't have her talking in a language us non-mom's don't understand. Now, don't get me wrong, I love all my friends who are becoming mothers. I just don't understand about 85% of what you guys are talking about. I'm at a COMPLETELY different point in my life where I'm just still trying to climb the ladder, rather than fill my days with diapers and strollers and $400 breast pumps, apparently.

So the Caldwells {who need a blog if you ask me} have just become the proud parents to Mr. Strongbow Caldwell. And Sara has already approached me for puppy training advice. I guess its because I've had my fair share of experience with these guys...

but don't take it from me because Hudson wears a belly band inside while I'm at work. So clearly, I failed somewhere along the way. My guess would be my 4 month depression phase that I was NOT MOTIVATED!

But despite that fashion accessory, I told Sara I would give my advice for getting a crying puppy to adapt to her schedule. So, here goes.

Call me crazy, but Puppy raising is kinda like raising a baby. KIND OF.

Schedules are EVERYTHING!!

And just like newborns, puppies don't adapt to our 6am-11pm lifestyle right off the bat. But, it is very possible to make this happen!! Unfortunately, Sara, it will take some time and you're going to get frustrated. A lot.

He's going to whine and yelp and scratch his crate. He's going to want to play at 3am. And you'll find that he's passed out at 6:45 am while your showering. GREAT.

BUT eventually, he will adapt.

Since you're crate training {I'm a HUGE fan of this method}, the best thing you can do is give him a crate schedule that fits around when you are home. You'll read books and forums with a bunch of different ideas of how often you should let him out. But the basic concept is that he learns to find his crate to be a safe place and he will learn to not relieve himself in his safe place. AS SOON as you get home, pick him up {DO NOT LET HIM TOUCH THE FLOOR} and take him straight outside. Wait until he uses the restroom before coming inside. Be patient. The first several weeks, he won't go immediately. Boys are worse, unfortunately. He's going to want to dilly dally, but just gently try to get him re focused on the task at hand. Take him to the same spot every time because he will pick up on the smells and it will trigger him to go. PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE him when he does. After a week or two of this, he will start to get the hang of the process.

Then you take him back inside. I hate to say it, but for a while, you're going to have to watch him like a HAWK!! Anytime you think he is going to have an accident, pick him up and take him straight to his spot. See if he will go and if he does, make a big deal about it. Eventually, the goal is to trust him to hold it every hour and then every two hours, etc.

Schedule in some major play time. And then I would suggest having a set time to put him in his crate every night. NO FOOD NO WATER in the crate. This is his safe place!! Hudson's is called his fort. Leave the crate in the living room with you guys so he learns it is ok to be in there. He will see you interacting normally and eventually learn that he will be fine in the crate. I would suggest 30 minutes of that every night before you move him in the crate to wherever it stays overnight. It helped Hudson to drape a towel over his for a while.

Eventually, he will be on a schedule. At 8 pm every night, Hudson comes and tells me he's ready for bed. All because I stuck to this night after night.

I'm by no means an expert, but this is just what I've found to work.